• We Watered-Down Marriage Long before We Redefined It

    Defending Marriage Staff - November 12, 2015

    On June 26, 2015, the Supreme Court of the United States declared that states no longer have the right to recognize marriage as between one man and one woman. Despite what the Word of God and the U.S. Constitution say—the vast majority of state officials have decided to follow the Obergefell decision.

    How did we get to the point where we think marriage can exist between two people of the same sex? How did our view of marriage become so cheap? The truth is that we watered-down marriage long before we redefined it. Here are five fundamental rejections of biblical marriage that helped make the Obergefell decision possible:

    1) We rejected marriage as created by God.

    Genesis 1:27 (All Scripture quotes are taken from the NKJV),

    So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.

    Genesis 2:21-24,

    21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.

    23 And Adam said:
    ​​“This is now bone of my bones
    And flesh of my flesh;
    ​​She shall be called Woman,
    Because she was taken out of Man.”

    24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

    2) We rejected marriage as a life-long, exclusive union.

    Exodus 20:14,

    You shall not commit adultery.

    Matthew 19:3-9,

    3 The Pharisees also came to Him [Jesus], testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?”

    4 And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’ ? 6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

    7 They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?”

    8 He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”

    3) We rejected marriage as the only proper context for sexual relations.

    1 Corinthians 7:1-3,

    1 Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me:

    It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

    Hebrews 13:4,

    Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.

    4) We rejected marriage as directly connected to producing children.

    Genesis 1:27-28,

    27 So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

    5) We rejected marriage as a picture of the gospel.

    Ephesians 5:22-33,

    22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

    25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. 31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.


    As we see our state officials redefining marriage so readily, let’s remember who put them into office—we did. We elected a lot of “traditional marriage” people, but when push came to shove that didn’t mean much. We elected leaders who viewed marriage as something cheap, as a strategic way to receive tax benefits, as something they could discard if it meant keeping their jobs. If we want officials who will stand their ground and put their lives, their fortunes and their sacred honor at risk to defend marriage, then we must elect men who recognize the purpose and the value of marriage, as outlined above. Only men with a biblical understanding of marriage will have the courage to stand up and oppose the Supreme Court.

    Another reason why so many of our state officials have surrendered is because no one is willing to stand behind them. In reality, we’re just like the people we elected—believing in an outward form of marriage that has no real value or substance to it. We’ve rejected biblical marriage already, and we don’t really care if it gets redefined. This is what happens when we abandon God’s Word—our systems of morality only stand for so long. The only way to preserve the recognition of true marriage in America is to humble ourselves before God and start defining marriage in our own lives the way He defines it.

  • About the author: Defending Marriage Staff

    Defending Marriage is a ministry of Hope Baptist Church that documents the breaking news, tracks the persecution and provides the biblical arguments surrounding the debate over the definition of marriage. You can sign up for email updates from Defending Marriage here.